childish tycoon

I just watched "Geothermal Escapism" or affectionately Community: Lava World.

Now before I write about this beautifully written episode I want to say that if you haven't watched Community yet, get on that. 

I started watching the show during the summer. I had some things going on and emotionally I was a mess. I didn't want people to know that and I covered it up well. My roommate provided  me with come great distractions by introducing me to new TV shows. Community is the one that was the best for me. 

Community captured my heart. The writer, Dan Harmon, created a community of social outcasts that come together at Greendale Community College to form a "study group" that comes to see each other as family. It is a hilarious show that makes you come to love these seven outcasts as they make the journey through their undergrad together. 

(This is where there might be spoilers and where I probably won't be able to convey effectively what I'm feeling.)

The show has been on the air for four seasons and just started the fifth about 4 weeks ago. Going into this season, I knew that Donald Glover who plays Troy would be leaving and I did not expect to get emotional over that. 

That being said, Dan Harmon wrote this episode beautifully and I would have cried if I had watched it alone. 

The whole episode was a big game of HOT LAVA. Yes, I'm talking about the game we played as kids where we couldn't touch the floor because it was lava. The lighting, cinematography, witty quips, and everything about the episode resonated with my imagination. 

And then there was the fact that the game was sponsored by Abed as a way to divert Troy from leaving. If you haven't watched the show, you should know that Troy and Abed have the most wonderful bromance in the all of fiction. They are friends for each other like I only hope to be to those around me. 

At the climax of the episode, Abed admits to Troy and to himself why he instigated the game, “It’s not a game for me, Troy. I see real lava because you’re leaving...I don’t think the lava’s here because you’re leaving—it’s here because I won’t let go.”

And then Abed lets go and falls into the lava. Britta comes to Troy's side and helps him clone Abed to bring him back to life. When Abed comes back, he says that he is a perfect clone, but he did lose his emotions in the process of the cloning. Then, Troy dies to the lava to get cloned so that he won't have his emotions when he has to say goodbye.

The episode ends on some good notes with wonderful goodbyes. The last goodbye is to Abed with a clone hug. That was the moment that almost made me cry. That combined with "Come Sail Away" by Styx which Troy once said, "...always makes me cry." He gets on a boat that Pierce left him to sail around the world with Levar Burton, his childhood hero, to earn his part of his inheritance from Pierce.

I feel like I imagine things too much sometimes especially when I don't want to accept a change. I just need to embrace those things. Fall into them. I know I talk a good game and seem prepared for the things in front of me, but I am so scared. I'm like Abed and no one really understands me. I don't know what the future holds and I feel as prepared for it as a rock in a tumbler. All I know is that I will come out more refined and beautiful in the end. I just need to jump in.

"I'm sailing away, 

Set an open course for the virgin sea,

'Cause I've got to be free,

Free to face the life that's ahead of me,

On board, I'm the captain, so climb aboard,

We'll search for tomorrow on every shore,

And I'll try, Oh Lord I'll try, to carry on!

I look to the sea,

Reflections in the waves spark my memory,

Some happy, some sad,

I think of childhood friends and the dreams we had,

We lived happily forever, so the story goes, 

But somehow we missed out on the pot of gold

But we'll try the best that we can to carry on....

....come sail away with me!"

~STYX